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Episode 17

Klarissa’s POV

I hadn’t seen Lily at school for three days after the weekend. I really wished I had some way to contact her. But I knew she didn’t have a mobile phone.

I was worried about her. I really hoped she was okay.

We were sitting around the TV after dinner. Mum was watching her stupid reality TV shows. Dad was judging everything happening on the shows as per usual. And mum was getting mad at him. Karly, Kalvin & I were the only kids in the living room.

Married At First Sight was playing. Aka, the most ridiculous reality TV show ever. If you could even call it a reality show. Most of it seemed scripted. It was a load of shit.

But I suddenly found myself interested in it tonight. A gay woman had just introduced herself. She was about to get married to another lesbian on the show.

I couldn’t ever work out what straight girls saw in men. There was just nothing about them that was even mildly attractive. Females, however. I loved them. One day, I wanted to see a woman walk down the aisle in a gorgeous wedding dress. I wanted to exchange rings with her. Kiss her. That’s what I wanted some day in the future. And I couldn’t see a problem with it.

I was distracted by the show for the first time in my life, but was brought back to life when I heard dad’s deep voice.

“This show was crap enough already. And now they have fags on it. Can they stoop any lower?”

My heart beat fast and my chest tightened.

“What’s wrong with it, dad?” Karly asked. She seemed pretty angry.

“There is no use for gay couples in this world. They don’t do anything for us. They can’t reproduce, and they’re straight out wrong. Plus, they all cause drama. Do you really thing gay people don’t choose to be gay for attention. As if,”

Karly rolled her eyes.

“If you have a problem with it, Luke, nobody is making you watch it. It’s 2019 for god’s sake,” Mum snarled. 1

“Fine then,” he said, opening up his newspaper.

My chest was tight, I couldn’t breathe. Was that really how dad felt about gay people? If only I was straight.

I walked out of the living room, into Karly & I’s bedroom, where I collapsed onto my bed.

I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t want his words to have that affect on me. But they did. He was my dad, and he didn’t accept people like me. I could never tell him.

“Klarissa…” Kalvin said gently, patting my shoulder.

“What’s wrong Klarissa?” Karly asked, sitting beside me.

I sat up, quickly wiping my eyes dry.

“Nothing,” I said. Even though I knew they’d see straight through that lie.

They must have guessed.

“You know you can tell us anything, right?” Kalvin asked.

“Yes,” I said. I loved my brother. And I loved all my other siblings despite how annoying they could get.

“Was it anything to do with what dad said?” Karly asked.

“Or is something else upsetting you?” Kalvin asked.

“It’s about what dad said,” I said, without thinking.

I felt Kalvin’s arms wrap around me, and Karly joined in too so I was now enveloped in a hug.

“I’m a lesbian,” I whispered.

“I’ve never had any interest in guys, and I’d finally worked it out. I’ve been in the closet for years. But you guys can’t tell anyone,” I said.

I felt vulnerable. Like I would shatter at any touch. I had never shared this with anyone before in my whole life.

“Klarissa. I love you.” Kalvin said.

“And your sexuality doesn’t change anything in the entire world. Dad’s stupid. Don’t listen to him. Don’t let it get to you,” He said, arm still wrapped around my back.

“You have our full support, Klarissa. It’s dumb that people have to come out anyway. And of course we won’t tell anybody. This is something personal to you. You can tell people when you’re ready. And just know that if dad ever finds out somehow, we still love you. And you can always talk to us,” Karly smiled, squeezing my hand.

I felt lighter. It was nice to finally tell someone.

“I’m so lucky, guys. I love you,” I said. They kept hugging me until I had stopped crying.

“One question,” Karly said, when she had taken her arms off me.

“Is there a girl?” She raised her eyebrow.

I blushed, thinking of Lily. How beautiful she was, the tingles I got whenever I was around her, the overwhelming butterflies in my stomach when I hugged her or she took my hand.

“There is,” I said.

“But it’s just a hopeless crush,”

Kalvin nodded.

“Is her name Lily, perhaps?” He asked.

I blushed as red as a tomato.

“Maybe,” I said.

“Come on, we saw you with her today. You’re so into her. And she’s so into you,” Karly said.

“As if,” I said, blushing.

I wished.


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