Bitch

Episode 3

“What took you guys so long?” He asked the person standing at the door. “Where are the dru…” Richard was about to add when the person cut in;
“Oh!, you were already expecting me? Good to know, that makes my job a lot easier. Here are the papers” he handed a file to Richard who was wondering why a clown was giving him a file.

As he took the file, he saw it at first but didn’t want to believe it, so he rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands and saw it once again, boldly written at the top of the file was;
“LAGOS STATE CUSTOMARY COURT, Isolo” .
The man noticed Richard’s
change of facial and he grinned,and then added;
“You just got served”
Richard nearly passed out.

Many social scientists all over the world have stated and proven that distance makes the heart grow fonder but if Zainab was used as a case study, that theory wouldn’t have been correct.
Its been over three days since Jummy made the call to her lawyer who in turn delivered the divorce papers to Richard but she hadn’t gotten any response from Richard, and this only made Zainab hate Richard the more, she had almost cried out all the tears in her tears gland but after waking up that morning, she didn’t feel the urge to cry anymore, after all, it wasn’t worth it, or so she thought.
As she paced round the house deep in thoughts, she finally paused at the front of the thirty two inches plasma LCD TV set which hung on the wall and thought out loud;
“So that FOOL doesn’t even want to attempt to settle this shey?” She thought, emphasizing on the “fool”,
“He thinks I’ll be the one to beg him or what? In fact its over between us, and the funny thing is I was willing to take him back if he had come earlier to beg oh…” She added and then quickly walked to her room as if she was being chased or something like that.
She checked if her credit card was in her hand bag before lifting it on to her shoulder, and on her way out of the house, she picked up the car keys that were on the dining table and “out” she went.

Thirty minutes later, Zainab parked her Honda Accord in the parking lot of “Spot One” . Spot One wasn’t as famous as other relaxation/ good time places in Festac, but if you had money to spend and you wanted to buy the best relaxation money could afford, then it is the place you need to be.

The way she walked into the building and navigated to a seat close to the swimming pool with much confidence only showed that Zainab had been there before and was probably a regular, as she sat, a waiter came to her table almost immediately and asked for her order, Zainab was in the mood to let go of all the troubles in her life so she simply replied;
“Get me anything that would make me forget my way home”
The waiter smiled at this funny request and replied;
“Give me a minute, I know what you need”
While she waited, she picked up her phone and dialed a number;
“Hello” she said.

“Ah! Bestie of life! Ki lo shele na? (what’s happening?)” the recipient replied.

“Wait oh, Jumoke! why are you so razz? can’t you speak plain english for once? Must you speak gibberish always?” Zainab asked knowing fully well what Jumoke response would be like.

“Eh? Ta lon soro (who is speaking?)!” Jummy replied just to confirm who she was speaking to first.

“Are you blind? Can’t you see the name of the caller on your phone screen? Or are you still using that your blind phone? I’ve told you to get yourself a new phone, haven’t I?”
“Make I no talk wetin they my mind, because if I talk am, you fit run come kill me for my house. Anyway, wetin they happen na?” Jummy replied in an attempt to change the topic.

“Err.. Where are you at the moment now?”
“I they house”
“No work today?”
“Today na democracy day na, abi them no teach you for primary school say no work on public holidays?”
Zainab was tired of speaking plain english to her friend who wasn’t even attempting to switch her pigin, so she responded;
“Okay, good. I dey spot one now, you fit come jamb me for there?”
“Ah!!! Zainab is flexing sha, e be like say money don land, owo lon soro!!!” Jummy tried to flatter Zainab, and as Zainab never let flattery to get to her, she simply replied;
“Shey you they come or not?”
“Na question be that? I don they road already na, abi you no trust me?”
Zainab just laughed and hung up.

Just like clock work, as Zainab ended the call the waiter arrived at her table approximately a minute later, he dropped a drink which was in a transparent bottle and had no label on it, he placed it on her table and before he left, he said;
Don’t drink too much if you don’t want to have a permanent loss of memory”
Zainab smiled and replied;
“Perfect!”.