Crushed

Episode 15

I have two news- one good news and one bad news. Which one would you love to listen to first?

That was the first question Dr. James from South Africa Specialist Hospital asked after conducting series of tests on our boy.
My husband pulled at my skirt as we watched on.

I was unexpectedly composed although all the bolts holding my jaws had been loose as I could only look on with a façade smile
My husband was really shaken by the incidence even more than I

Whoever says medical doctors have had their feelings and emotions mauled by their years of experience should come and see my husband and be convinced that they are also human beings having blood flowing through their veins.

He was really hit!
Well, Jean was the only child we had!
It was quite understandable then that we had to send for a specialist so that there wouldn’t be any interference of any kind
Good news and bad news?

“Erm…the good news first” I said and my husband, who was shaking seriously, placed his head on my shoulder.
Dr. James was not smiling though
“The good news is that the spinal cord of our child is still very intact. There is no injury of any kind” he said and my eyes shone
My husband almost jumped up
“For real?” he exclaimed
My eyes didn’t leave Dr. James for a moment.

The expression was not consoling!
“Dr. James, what’s the bad news?” I asked and he looked into my face penetratingly.

“Mrs. Douglas” he called out and I held my breath, praying as I did
“Dr. James” I replied as my husband reversed back to the seat beside me, his hands on my laps, tugging at my flesh as if it was a dough.
I looked into his face and though he gave me a smile, I knew he was very anxious- his lower lip was pursed
“Does any of you have a history of cancer or any kind of tumor?” he asked and I had a sudden migraine
“Cancer?” I asked in a shaky voice, jumping as though I had learnt that a bomb was planted on the bench on which I was seated
“You can’t be serious my doc” my husband said as he laughed in a way that made me very scared.

I went close to him and held him to myself as I looked into Dr. James’ eyes
“Check again my Doctor James. There could be a mistake somewhere please. Never has anyone in my family or his been diagnosed of cancer or lumps or tumor” I explained
“Never!” my husband exclaimed too, vibrating against my chest
“Well, I am so sorry but some cancerous cells were found in his bone marrow. I am afraid he is in the early stage of Leukemia” he said and my head jumped off from body.
My husband disengaged from me as he heard and staggered to the window panes.
I could see it on his face- mist
Were those sweat or tears?

Leukemia?

I had only been hearing of it but never had I imagined that I could have a close relative who would have it
I didn’t even know what it meant.