Diary Of A Lekki Houseboy

Episode 12

“So all this kids smokes? God! And their papas and
mamas na deacons and deaconesses in church oh.

Omo! Me I still be learner be that nah.. See comfirm
ashewo sha, maybe na dem go disviirgin me at last
nah, if only asamoah knows I just made his sister
Kum.. Chai!!!!!!!”

I was so lost in thoughts when I saw my VVVIP
ticket talking to one guy and she was holding a
smirn off ice can.

From the look of things, the guy was a hell of ajebo.

Probably a half cast, before before, if I see boy wey
fine pass me dey talk to babe, I dey shame to enter
the convo but today!, chai! Today!!, I no go fear.

(High moral plus a little drunk.. Nothing like it! )
“Hey ticket, heard you been looking for me”. I said
with a bossy voice.
“Dummy, where have you been?” She asked.
“Looking for my lost senses, seems I have found the
bush they entered” I said in a naughty manner.
We were still in our humour exchanges when the
dude standing with her coughed(Trust me, I know
that feeling ). We exchanged pleasantries as I
asked my ticket(Faith) to the dance floor.
She told me she couldn’t dance at first but hey!
Who cares? As far as I am at her back shaking and
moving in trying to resurrect my dead lagbaja.
2face Idibia;s Chemical Reaction was on disc when
faith and I got to the dance floor. At this moment,
the girls were tired, some where hanging out at the
pool with their guys, some sitting on the chairs
arranged in the sitting room and ofcousrse, I could
see humans in shadey corners.

Ok, why do ladies always lie that they can’t dance?

Lie about you being a virgin, I will personally
sponsor the lie, even lie to you after s*x that
you were indeed a virgin.. But about dance? I
no like am ohhh!!!!!

Come and see this girl rock me on the dance floor
sotey I beg DJ to stop!.. She was shy at first,
perhaps it was the Song that wasn’t good.

But immediately “Aboki, Shine my shoe” song came up,
come see grinding. (Ajebo sef sabi dis song? Chai!)
Due to the scantiness of the dancefloor, I couldn’t
touch her anyhow (Gentleman ) but looking at
those b.0-0.bs vibrate, I fit die” ” on top her matter
ohh!!! *e b like say wizkid later experience this kind
tin fah *

I think the boys pitied me because 2 of them gave
me a helping hand by surrounding faith who was
now getting tired. I was angry at first as I wanted
to hold my territory, but I dey tellz you, He works in
mysterious ways!!!!!.

(You know who HE is nah! Make I no commit
blasphemy sha )
“Baby, can we go to a quiet place? Not comfortable
with guys touching you anyhow”. I said in whispers.

(Ok, to be honest, I still lacked self esteem when it
came to faith but what I just said was the truth, I
was jealous of boys touching her anyhow)
“You think?” She answered with a smile that had
“What took you so long before you asked” written
all over it.

She led the way as I once again, held her waist to
hide my hard-on.

Ahahahahahah! How did I forget to tell y’all that Mr
Lagbaja finally woke up? . The Depressed cow
stood up nah , e be like say him takek words of
encouragement from my tongue.

Like “If I could make Yvonne faint(wash) in less
than 5mins for my first time, you can make Faith
beg for more. C’mon lagbaja, grab the courage and
get out of your mask to show your fans who you
really are, you can do it man!!!!!”. (Abeg incase you
miss road, that was the tongue talking to lagbaja in
my mind )

Lol! I know!!!!! the tongue is crazy right? , well,
you won’t blame it nah, e nor easy to enter place
wey pee, blood and other jedi jedi tinx dey commot
from and come out alive nah. .