Diary Of A Lekki Houseboy

Episode 20

I didn’t need any ministrations before I knew that I
needed to leave that room else I jam wetin I nor
plan..(If na molest, I go like am oh! )
Just as I was leaving, I heard the bathroom door
open.. “Arrrrgh! Na three girls? Abi na one of them
dey enter? “.. I asked myself as I turned to see
who was coming out(or going in? )
“Ummm.. What’s that your name again?”..

Michael asked as I could tell he was having a hangover..

Surprisingly he wasn’t angry! ( , he didn’t even
know my name? Why? )
“Danladi…..”.. I answered him with some kind of
mixed feelings. But make e for no lost, I come form
ask “And you? Can’t really remember your name
“(god punish devil!!! )
“Michael Ray man, why you spying on my ladies?
You want some of them? You can take.. They were
paid for 24hours service” (that explains why he
wasn’t angry)..

Ok, Wait, did he just made what I thought(and
wrote) few minutes ago an ordinary miscalculated
imagination?(Ahahaha! You also read it? No vex!

False alarm ). As in, they weren’t le$bians? , or
is he playing me? , arrrrgh! That means that girl
knew I lied when I told her It was my room? .. No
wonder she looked at me like that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..

Wetin carry me come here self? If to say I even see
the Tobby and Yvonne(girl wey I don already
condemn with my mind), wetin I for do them? ..

You will be amazed how fast thoughts can be when
I tell you I thought all those things in less than a
second! .

“N…no man, gotta save some seamens for later you
know? Digged enough pussay already.. Merry
Christmas and thanks for the party bro(like he is
the owner.. Mtchewww)” I said as I walked out of
the room with the fakest smile ever!!!.. But I looked
back and noticed those were the girls that were in
bikinis earlier(Ashieawos) but I wonder why I didn’t
notice em on time(I didn’t care?) .

“Why you dey lie to feel among? I never dig
anything oh! So I be digger abi? Na him u dey use
me brush yanxxh and pussay since yesterday? Abi
hands don dey secrete seamen?”.. Y’all know the
minister that said that right?..

On my way back to the pool with my tail between
my legs because I was thinking of what they might
be saying about me in that room (Don’t try this..

Its
depressive), I decided to use “writelonger” to log in
my twitter account, went straight to my profile and
to my surprise.. I gained 20 Followers in just
6hours! (This has never happened to me oh!

Can’t
even remember when up to three people followed
me at once..)
With a curious, shocked and umm.. A curious mind,
I opened my mentions and saw so many mentions..
.. “Like seriously? How come? Abi I logged into
the wrong account?”.. I asked myself as I tried
reading the mention while I worked.

The first mention I got/read was something like
“@__ being used as a tool and he thinks he is
making me jealous? Fool!” (Guess who tweeted
it!!!… It was that guy that was standing with faith
earlier nah.. Yeah! That same one that sat beside
her by the pool.. Well, I got to know his name was
Ken )
Inshort, let me read the tweets I can remember
(erase “read” and put “write” please!!!!! )

• “@_ aint no niggah pulling me down, you will loose” 3hoursago *”@ By the time you see this, you will prolly be
  crying 3hoursAgo (this was tweeted with a picture
  of him and faith in school..

Guess they were classmates? ).. (Ok! Those tweet
weren’t funny, and they didn’t make sense did
they? yes they did jor! .)..

Didn’t wanna reply him, because I wanted to see
faith and ask if what I was thinking was true(like
they were once, or still lovers).. Plus real guys don’t
do tweetfights, (didn’t say celebs aint real sha )
we throw punches!! Last time I checked, I can’t fight. Just make mouth
On getting back to the chair, I saw Faith and the
guy(ken) talking.. “Again ?!!!!” I exclaimed in my
mind as I was in full rage.. (My Ile Binu(Benin City)
blood was booming as I wanted to show this Rich
boy that he is a BOY.. He dey craze?)..

“Break He head, Commot he teeth, take that
bottle”.. These were things my mind was
whispering. Like was I that drunk? .. I shut out
the mind as I put my Rage in control because I
didn’t want to disrespect the people that brought
me here. Besides, break head on christmas day?
What if he papa na General? Or A Politician? Abegi..

“Faith.. Can we talk?” I said with a straight face as I
could see Ken was laughing stylishly.. Damn! My
mouth was smelly!!!!!!! But that’s a story for
another day..
“I guess you must have seen the tweets that fa..g
tweeted” as we walked away from where he sat.

*Convo
Me: Are you two or were you two having an affair?
Faith: What kind of a question is t..
Me: A kind that needs an answer right now! (I
interrupted as I held her left hand with my right).
Faith: Ladi you are hurting me!
Me: And I am supposed to care?
Faith: Alright fine, what you want to know? That he
was my first love? That I lost my virginity to him?
Or that he is the Guy I said stays in london?(If you
reason like I did when she said this, then we are
going to be sad together I tell you
)
Maybe these were the things I wanted to hear.. But
damn! I really wished I was wrong.. Because right
about now, it was so heartbreaking and painful that
I wanted to enter the ground… Like this was a
moment I was torn apart.. Woo! Let me not
remember that time jare..

And hell yeah, the fact that he was in london self
added to the depression. ..

I guessed I was Inlove with faith.. Or perhaps just
an infatuation. Whatever it was, I was dead to the
world.. Why does it have to be called Heartbreak?
Why does heartbreak sounds so heartbreaking?