Diary Of A Lekki Houseboy

Episode 35

Was washing the car when Esther came in through
the gates, she just greeted me and mocked me
washing the car in the afternoon like “Awww!

My
poor baby, showing another talent of his.. So
touching “..
That wasn’t what I was expecting though , I
thought I was now a god to her, that she would hug
me but who sigh? She went straight to the house
anyways..
Still displaying my talent , my mind decided to
pop up a query that goes thus: “Why did Daniel ask
of Esther? Why did he ask you to wash the car by
this time? And why was he behaving somehow
when you did a little amebo ?”..

It was then I thought of something you will
probably be thinking of now.. But I couldn’t just
believe it, so I just hurried up to wash the car in
order to return the keys to Uncle’s room to see if
what YOU are thinking right now and what I WAS
thinking was true.

On my way to his room, I decided to check on
Abigail in her room but I could see she was deeply
asleep(Thanks to me ), this made me smile a little
and returned to my straight face as I headed to
uncle’s room.

I tried listening through the door or peeping
through the Key Hole but damn all those Turkish
Bullet Proof doors!!! The thing nor gree me peep or
even listen.. *Oh! Daniel was into imported luxury
doors and kitchen cabinets *
“How I go do am now? Make I knock? Or make I
just go to the window make I see if I go hear
anything? Nah.. The window will be closed because
of the AC.. Abi make I shout “Uncle’?”.. that was my
mind wandering aroung the place..

I was lost in thoughts while my ear was still pasted
on the door(the yeye thing still wan hear something
mtchewww) when I heard a door opened.. With
some speed, I wanted to act fast and be normal but
before I could iron the planned action, I heard a
voice say “Who are you eavesdropping on?”..
I knew who it was oh! But I still wanted to
confirm…I looked up and it was Uncle Daniel
coming out of Esther’s room with a face I will pass
for that of an angry legion..

“Guy your own don done!!.. See your life?”.. My
mind said as I jerked out in my local dialect that I
was returning the keys to the car..
“Is that why you are eavesdropping?”.. He said in
some commanding voice..
“Uncle no oh!.. I be dey knock but nobody answer, I
come dey hear voices for my head, I been tink say
na from this room e dey come, not knowing it was
from the other room”.. I said with fear but
adorned with senses…
“Will you shut up your mouth? Useless boy, the
witches in your village are already talking to you
eh? Common get out of here before I open my
eyes”.. He said as he collected his keys..
*as for the Wicthes, Y’all know Edo na.. Juddywoko
abeg yahn dem *
No.. I wasn’t sad , I knew what I said had some
effects on him, especially when Esther come out of
the room to see what was happening.. Instead, I left
with a smile in my face and my mind kept on saying:
“Smart Guy.. He dey bleep Wife and In-law, come
get another mistress outside, upon say he dey use
(S) condom oh! Chai.. Make I catch that he wife
that also cheats, she go confess say families indeed
have different things in common”
I lost all my sense of pity for both Joyce and Daniel,
and for Esther, the idea that she was having an
affair with my uncle just made me want her more
.. So I sat in the sitting room, thinking of how
studip some people think..

My phone rang and it was my Mum, she asked how
I was doing and how I am preparing for Jamb and
all other mother-son stuffs, she mentioned
something about a bad dream.. Me being in the
middle of a storm but walking like nothing
happened, like I was the master of the storm.. *Y’all
know the stories and prayers *
After the call dropped, I always thought I had
talents in interpreting dreams , so I interpreted
the dream as me being in control of My Uncle, His
wife and.. His three in-laws that came to spend
christmas holiday. *Good feeling I tell you *
“Ladi.. Am going out, when my Wife comes, tell her I
went to Abu’s place aiite?”.. My Uncle said with a
smile as he met me in the sitting room.
I didn’t reply(Strange?) and it looked like his guilty
conscience was playing a game on him as he asked
if I have eaten, if I had pocket money and if I have
heard from my family.. As a sharp guy, I told him I
was broke and surprisingly, he gave me Two
Thousand Naira. He said stuffs about how sorry he
was for shouting on me as his business trip was not
that good and bleh bleh bleh.. (I swear I liked my
new Uncle )
When he left, I just couldn’t stop to think how
clueless he was.. The same Abu that has been oiling
your wife’s engine? Na him u wan go see? Abeg dey
go jare!