Hidden Dreams

Episode 41

He might not come back to see me alive but I will pray God makes me deliver this child so that he will see the product of our love” I cried my heart to him.

I saw him look down at his shoes. It was evident my words struck him hard. I went on telling him about my condition and at the end when we both talked calmly I made him vow to never say a thing until Jay was done with his studies.

” I might die anytime soon but he has a while life ahead of him. I want him to be happy and so please I know he will not like this but it’s for his own good.”
We made a pact to keep the baby a secret and surprisingly Jay’ s father kept in touch and even helped me with finances for the hospital bills. I had to remain under constant observations. The Doctor was hired to be coming to check on me until I finally gave birth.

I had almost died after delivery . The Doctors told me I remained unconscious for almost 5 hours and they all had lost hope of me making it out alive. .they told me it was a miracle I was still alive as my heart was now failing me. My baby was healthy.

Jay’ s father came over to the hospital and I told him to help me find a nanny for the baby. Of which he gladly agreed to.

Months went on and my health didn’t improve. It was in and out of the hospital.
I fought hard not to call Jay, I couldn’t do so because my voice and the loss of weight would sell me out. The last thing I wanted was him loosing track of his career. With everything in me I prayed he would become successful.

One day his father came and told me as he always did about how Jay was fairing and that he was taking part in the World dancing competition. I smiled and told him I knew he was going to make it..

I watched all the shows of the competition on DSTV. With every stage getting more interesting seeing how he was determined and danced exceptionary.

I didn’t get to watch the finale as I was rushed to the hospital that day.
I woke up and asked how it went and my brother told me he made it.
I relaxed in the hosptal bed knowing I would now die in peace.” Tell him I love him so much and am proud of him” I told his father who had visited me.

” tell him….” I wanted to say and he cut me short
” you will come tell him yourself cause his on his way to you. He told the whole world he did it for you and my wife told me they are coming tomorrow.”
” what? No way, I can’t let him see me like this. It will kill him. Please tell him am out of town” I begged crying.
” I can’t promise that my dear, you know him he wiIl look for you. So I have no option but to bring him. You tell him about that girl he fathered. I think its high time everyone knew the truth” he added seriously.
” I can’t hide this from the family anymore Angela. Even if you think you are dying, give him the chance to say good bye. He deserves that don’t you think?” He asked
I cried out not wanting to see his face when he saw how much I had lost. But his father had a point. I had to let him know about everything.
I sat in the bed when my sister in law came to visit me. I was taking some water when the door to the ward slowly opened.
I turned to look at who had walked in and my heart stopped for a bit when I saw him stand by the door way. He had grown so much and he looked more handsome than the last time I saw him. His well fitting clothes making him look like a movie star.
My eyes were fixed at him when I realised how sad he looked. His smile faded instantly and I saw tears run down his face as he stared my way without blinking.
I wished I had the strength to stand up and ran to him. But was so weak my body couldn’t move.
I too started shedding tears and he rushed towards me holding me in a hug so close I felt his heart beat run faster.
” you came back?” I whispered sniffing the the tears from my eyes as my heart bled. The fear of dying so soon gripping my throat like never before. I wasn’t as ready to go as I had initially thought.