Stepping Into Maggie’s Shoes

Episode 12

Hypomania was about to have a full expression in me. I knew I was just walking. Hypomania made me walk long distance without being tired. I was so heartbroken by Julius’ betrayal, that I wanted to run far away from him or kill him.

My phone was ringing, but I wasn’t ready to pick up any call. A lot of thoughts were flashing through my brain… I thought of killing Julius, and it seem like a good idea because I won’t be jailed for it. I was a medically Insane person and if I killed anyone, I won’t be punished for it.

I thought of how to go about it, I thought of strangulating him but I knew I didn’t have the power or strength to do it…

I thought of Poisoning him, all I needed to do was to go back home and pretend all was ok. I would look for the best time to poison his food…

“No!, Happiness, you should not do this?” I heard the second voice in my head saying this…

At that point, I knew the voice I was to listen to, I should listen to the later voice that just spoke, because the last time I listened to the first voice, I did something terrible…
What?

I poured Acid on Christabel…
Yes! That was my doing… I broke down in tears on the road thinking of how it had happened…

I was in my room that day, and I heard the strange voice in my heard…
“ Christabel and Nneka are after Apostle, but you know, you are the one that should step into Pastor Maggie’s shoe… Nneka will be easy to eliminate because she is your friend, but Christabel will be a hard one, Unless you do something else”
“ What?, I asked the voice
“ By pouring Acid on her face…All you need is to wear a mask over your face”
I obeyed this voice and traced Christabel to her house on Sunday evening on her way back from house fellowship. I knew she didn’t drive to the fellowship center as it was close to her house. She had mentioned it during one of her bluffing moments…
“ I don’t walk, the only time I ever walk is on Sunday evening when I go for house fellowship”

I had waited for her to show up. As she waited at the gate of her house for her security to open up, I ran towards her and poured the acid on her face.
I was not happy after I did it, but it wasn’t my fault, it was the other voice in my head…
Now, the same voice is telling me to kill Julius…
My phone kept ringing, I looked at the caller ID and I discovered it was Apostle. I sensed God had told Him something, I ended his call. Almost immediately he sent a text…

“ I don’t know what is going on with you, but don’t do anything you will live to regret…You have the strength to control the devil’s choices, don’t let the devil control you…”
How did he know what was happening to me… ? I wanted this Apostle to let me be…
I replied in capital Letters “ LEAVE ME ALONE, I HATE YOU” I guessed that would make him back off, but Instead I got a text
“ YOU ARE LOVED…”
I replied instead

“ No, Everyone hates me, including God”
“ Where are you?” He replied
“ On my way to hell, because I am about to kill someone” I replied…

I barred his number from calling or sending me a text. I called my mother instead
“ Mum, I feel I am in my hypomania mood” I said

“ Where are you?” She said in a panic
“ I am about to kill someone “
I ended the call and barred her from reaching me too

The next person I needed to call was my Doctor/ Therapist. I called him as well
“ Hello Doctor, My Head is all over the place,I am hearing voices” I said
“ Have you taken your pills?” He asked in a rush

“ Yes…but I feel like killing someone right now” I ended his call and barred him also…
I did all this routine call so that when Julius was dead, I would have people who will stand for me, that I did it under my psychosis or bipolar state…

I stopped by the market and bought some rat poison and went back home….

I know Christabel did not deserve what I did to her, but Julius deserved what I was about to do to him or what do you think…?