Episode 29
Emeka is pacing the length of the hospital.
âRelax Emeka, you doing that wonât make the doctor work any faster, relax!!!â Tayo watches Emeka.
But he doesnât stop.
Tayo walks to him âEmeka, stop, pacing, relaxâ
Olive walks out of the room and comes to them, Grace is by the corner quiet.
âAre you okay?â Emeka turns to Olive as he hugs her she nods wiping her nose.
âYes!â
âLook Olive, I am sorry, I was stupid, I shouldnât have put you in harmâs way, put none of you in harmâs way. I am sorry, to you too Tayo for not listening. I shouldnât have allowed my pain move me to do the unthinkable, I shouldnât have. You both are important to me and I am sorry, forgive me â
Olive shakes her head âItâs okay Emeka, at least we werenât harmed, but your father, Diana?â
His heart pulls âI know I know⊠I -â he chokes trailing off.
Tayo grabs his shoulders âhave a little faith Emeka, a little faithâ
As Tayo and Olive go to get coffee, Emeka moves to seat next to Grace, she doesnât turn.
âI know you hate me for what I did to Diana, I hate myself more, I am sorry for putting you in harmâs way and I know ââ
âYou donât have to apologise to me Emeka, you donât, itâs her you need to apologise to, not meââ
âWhat if she doesnât make it Diana, what if⊠she doesnât, what if I lost her this time forever?â
She turns to him, staring at him, she really looks at him, searching his eyes, understanding âWhy did you do this if you felt this way still?ââ
âBecause pain, because anger, because ego, because revenge was all I could think about and yet look at what my stupidty caused, my father, her, my mother, the people I love and they were the ones that were hurt , they were all affected, but this, it wasnât my intent Grace, it wasnât my intent to even put you, any of you in arms way, I am sorry. If something had happened to you how would I have been able to explain to junior how you died?â
âThank God Diana called the police before coming back out, thank God she did, she took a bullet for you Emeka, she took a bullet for you! No one would do that for you unless they love you. She loves you Emeka, if that isnât prove enough I donât know what isâ
âI know Grace, I know, and I felt an overpowering wave of guilt, I wanted to hurt her, but she is the one who is almost at the verge of death, I donât know how to forgive myself for this, if she dies I donât know what I would doâ.
âThen pray she doesnât, pray you get to tell her what you already know you feel and isnât going awayâ
âWhat is that?â
âI think you and I know that you cannot hide that emotion behind your eyes from everyone, you can lie to everyone but not yourself Emeka, all this must have been planned and it turned sour, but I think what you didnât plan to happen was to have that same feelings you had for her still, to resurface, that pain in your eyes isnât a lie Emeka. I hope you are able to let it all come forth, for your sake, you claimed to have a hardened heart but all I see is a soft heart Emeka, and Teco said it correctly, your heart is featherlight⊠there is pain and sorrow, there is hurt, but there is also love, and maybe even in your hate for her, for your father, there was a softness for your father, there was a place in your heart for him and it wasnât all hate, and your mother has another large portion of that heart, but do you know who owns the rest⊠it was never Olive, it wasnât other women, it was Diana, it has always been Diana, and I see it in your eyes right now, and if she does ever make it alive, I hope you are able to tell her the truth⊠for your sake because you wouldnât be able to live with yourself because this time, this time you were the one who pushed her away.â Grace says getting up and walking away.
âYou know she is right Emeka?â Tayo pushes a cup of coffee to his face
Emeka doesnât answer as he stares into the cup, closing his eyes as he lets the tears fall to the floor.
***TWO HOURS LATER ****
Tammy walks to them âSir! The money has been sent to the office, Agnes would handle it, Mama Tito brought food for everyone to eat so..â he trials off
âThank you Tammy, I am truly sorry about-â
âYou keep apologising Sir, itâs okayâ He chuckles â so, who is hungry?â
âMe, I am starving âTayo says âyou hungry bro, we have been here for hours, eat somethingâ
âNot until I hear something from the doctors, something positiveâ Emeka breathes.
TEN HOURS LATER*
âYour mother is coming to Sirâ the doctor says â she was sedated to put her out of shock but she has come to, you can go see her nowâ.
âAnd Diana, Ambross?â
âShe is still in surgery, the bullet needs to be removed, it barely missed her heart, and we have to be careful. She is lucky to still be breathingâ
âBut, it would be successful?â
âSir, we are doing all we canâ He reassures Emeka.
âAnd Ambross, you not saying anything about him?â
âWhen he was brought in he was barely alive. I am sorry but he is in a coma, and we cannot do anything much for him unless he comes out from it, he is on life support. But he is being monitored, but you do know that it is a fifty/fifty chance of him surviving this or not. He lost a lot of blood, his heart stopped when he got here, we had to resuscitate him with bolts of shock to the heart, he may not survive this because he slipped into a comma immediately, we only hope for the best, for now, you can see your mother, she is asking for youââ.
Emeka runs his hands over his head as he follows him to his motherâs private room.
Tayo goes to Grace as she hugs herself, praying silently âAre you okay, I am sorry about your friendâ he says seating down beside her.
She wipes her tears âShe will be fine, I know she will beââ
âI pray so, Emeka wouldnât forgive himself for putting her in harmâs wayâ
âBut you didnât talk him out of itâ
âBelieve me, I tried!â
âYou know the truth donât you, about how he really feels?â
âI suspected after it all, I didâ
Grace sighs âShe will be fine, all will be well I hopeâ
âMe too!!â
Emeka rushes to her as she made to seat up on the bed, he helps her, putting a pillow behind her as he sits on the bed, his head bowed, his hands in hers.
âEmekaââ Mercy began
âI am sorry!â he places his head in her hands, âI am sorry Mama, I am so sorry !!â he buried his face there and cried.
She places her hand on his head and pulls him up to rest on her b—m âA motherâs heart is hurt, itâs broken, but a mother cannot cast away someone she loves even though he hurt her, we sin every day and have come short of the glory of God and if God was a man he would have cut us off since and left us to perish, but what does he do? he forgives us on a daily, blesses us, and gives us access to his love. And that is the value I instill in you everyday. I know if you could change the hands of time you would wish you could go back before today and make a better decision?â
He nods âYes mama, I wish I could, I wish I never thought this evil thing in my heartââ
âNow you know your wrongs, your errors, and what God wants, is for you to change it, make amends, to forgive, to let go and make amends â
âBut Mama, I donât know how to, I donât know how to amend what I have broken. I have broken it to pieces that I am afraid glue wonât fix it , nothing can fix a broken heart Mama, nothing could fix mine, it cannot be fixed Mama, and I donât know what to doâ.
She raises up his head understanding what he was saying, for the first time she understood all he used to say, those time he mumbled to himself when he spoke about his pain ..
âMy son, it can be mended, time heals all wounds, your wound refused to heal because instead of closing it you drilled it with hate and anger and covered it with revenge. Now, instead of drilling in more hate, why donât you cover it with something else, that thing that you buried within it, with love Emeka. Itâs buried within you, fill it with love, and love fixes it all, bears it all, forgives it all, covers it all, glues all Emeka, it would glue back all the broken pieces of your heart, of her heart and make it one. Only love can mend what is broken, only love Emeka. God is love, God understood the power of love, a man to a woman, a child to his mother, a father to his son, a friend to a friend⊠love cuts across it all, itâs universal and not separated by race, religion or borders, it is the purpose of which we were created for, to love and be loved Emeka, to love our neighbours as ourselves, to love God, to love our own. Love is the glue you need and you donât need to search for it because it is there, in your heartâ she touches his chest âand all you were doing was trying to cover it, donât! I see it, I see it all Emeka, and for the first time, I will tell you Emeka, that Diana Nkenchior isnât the same woman you met years ago, as you are not the same man she met years ago⊠love changes allâ
He kisses his motherâs hands âI lost her Mama, I have, for the second time and itâs all my fault nowââ
âYou never lost what you never had Emeka, you didnât have her before, she wasnât yours. But now, she has given you her heart, but you havenât accepted her yet, you loved her then, she didnât love you. She loves you now, you rejected. You donât lose what you never had, you only let go when you do have her Emeka, and you will not let her go because Emeka, what is in hereâ she pokes his chest again â is more powerful than what you have up thereâ she touches his temple.
Emeka rests his head on her b—m; she wipes his tears as it wets her chest âMama, fatherâ â he trails off
âI know, the doctor told me, whatever is Godâs will, until then, I pray for his recoveryâ
âMe too Mama, me too!!â.
TWENTY-THREE HOURS LATER
âShe is out of surgery, she would be sedated for a few hours,â the doctor tells them as they sigh in relief
âThank you doctor!!â Emeka was relieved; she was out of danger, that was all that matters.
âGo home Emeka, come back later, she is fine, she just needs restââ
âNo I am not leaving hereâ
âGo home, I will stay with her ââ Grace says âDoctor, I will waitâ
âI think you need to go rest, have a shower, eat! Come, letâs go, you can be back later, you didnât sleep a wink all yesterdayâ Olive comes to him
âBut I am fine, I just want to-â
âĂmeka, go home, she wonât be awake for a few more hours at leastâ Tayo joins in.
Reluctantly he follows Olive as they leave the hospital; Tayo and Tammy leave too, Grace stays back after calling her nanny to make sure her son was alright.
Mama Tito is with Mercy, she would be discharge in a few hours.
Another Nine Hourâs Pass
Nine hours later, someone nudges her awake, Grace opens her eyes to see a nurse staring down at her âshe is awake, she is asking for youââ
Grace thanks her going to Dianaâs private room paid for by Emeka, she shuts the door behind her âHey Dee, I swear even in a hospital bed, you look amazing, I am envious!!â she seats on the bed.
Diana manages a smile removing the mask from her nose, her voice barely a whisper âFor a friend, you sU-Ck at lyingâ she says wincing in pain, she tries to shift further up.
âHey, Hey relax Dee, donât be too eager to get upâ Grace helps her.
âI just need to stay upââ
Grace is beside her and helps her again âyou really were stupid to jump in front of a bullet, what were you thinking, you would have died ââ
âI wasnât thinking, and what was I supposed to do? Watch him kill Emeka, even if he doesnât love me, I do love him, I rather die than see him hurtââ
Grace wipes her eyes as it pools âAnyways, you only think of man, man and man, what about me? I thought we were best-friends, what about junior? I thought he was your Godson, you just planned to leave us all?â
Diana shakes her head slowly âDo you know the craziest thing? I would do it again in a heart bitâ
Grace stares at her âThen I would wake you up and kill you myself for being stupid, no one has done what you didâ
âNo one has suddenly loved this man like I do, and I donât care to take a thousand bullets to right all my wrongs, to save the man I loveâ
Grace sighs âYou are always stubbornâ she wipes her tears.
Diana manages a smile âYou hate me?ââ
âI hated the other Diana, I love this one, but she is stupid and she shouldnât play the hero againâ
âFor him Grace, I will againâ
Grace sighs âI thought you actually left with the money and when you got shot, I wished you⊠you had embraced those qualities and ran with the money, I thought you were going to die and-â she sniffs.
âHey, itâs okay, I am here, donât worry you wonât be eating my burial Jellof rice anytime soon, I still got a few good years on you woman, so you are stuck with meââ
Grace laughs throwing her hands around her and sqÂŁÂŁzes her.
âOwww!!â Diana exclaims.
âOh I am sorry!â Grace releases âI am glad you are Okayâ
âAmbross, Emekaâs father?â
âIn a comaâ
Diana sighs sadly âMama? â
âShe is okayâ!â
She nods thankfully âThe lawyer, the friend, Mama Tito?â.
Grace smiles âThey are okayâ.
âOlive?â
âReally Diana ?â Grace was surpised.
âYes!!â
âShe is shaken, but okayâ
âOkayâ Diana says, looking at her hands.
âYou wonât ask of Emeka?â
âI know he is fine, and I know she would take care of him, she is a good girlâ
âYou know nothing Dianaâ
âKnow What?â
A knock on the door draws their attention away, Mama Tito pushes her head inside and walks to them âI came to check on you, I hope you are okay?â she says touching Dianaâs hand, a woman who could risk her life for a man, maybe she wasnât so bad after all, she smiles at Diana.
âI am fine Mama Tito, thank youâ
She nods âMama wantâs to see youââ
Grace stands up from the bed âI will wait outsideââ
Mama Tito and Grace leaves, Mercy is wheeled into the room by a nurse and leaves, Mercy wheels herself to Dianaâs side.
âMama, should you be out of the bed? They said you had partial paralysis because of the shock and- â
âNo I am fine, I am okay, just a shock but itâs gone, they just need me to stress my legsâ
âOkay Mama, I am glad you are fine!â
âYes, me too, that you are okayâ.
They are quiet.
âI came to apologise for my son Diana, I know I am also at fault here, if I had welcomed you and given you a chance I would have seen all this and maybe helped to avoid it. I am sorry for your pain. The one my son caused you, I am sorry for the ones I caused you, I was a mother protecting her child, I failed to see the pain behind his eyes and the other thing compressedâ
âWhat other thing Mama?â
âHe will tell you himself. Diana, we didnât get off on a good start, yet as my son broke you, you still saved his life.â
âBecause I couldnât bear to see the man I love get hurtâ
âI know, thank you for protecting my son, forgive me for those words Diana, forgive me for my attitude, forgive a motherâ.
Diana shakes her head âIt is i not you who would ask for forgiveness, I brought him pain and made him so angry at everything else. It is me Mama that needs your forgiveness; itâs me who needs to thank you. If you hadnât spoken to me the way you did, I wouldnât have realised the errors of my ways and changed it. Itâs because of you I was able to see clearly. I am sorry I had such bad thoughts against you, I am sorry for Emeka and everything else,. I am sorryâ
Silence
âI hope you make a quick recovery, and maybe we can start all over againâ
Dee smiles through her tears âThank you mama, â then she is sad again âI am sorry about Ambrossâ
âThere is still hope, he may or may not live, but at least his son has forgiven him, at least he had asked for forgiveness. I pray he livesâ she reaches out and touches Diaanaâs hands.
You are a strong woman Mama, to have survived all this and still be able to keep your head above water?ââ
âIt didnât start in a day. Get some rest Diana, â She wheels herself to leave.
âTell Emeka I am sorry!!â
âHe knows that Diana, but he will tell you his own apologises to your face!!â
Diana stares at the door, hoping it would open and Emeka walks in. But he didnât, not the next. Not the next, then she gave up on him ever coming to see her as the days continued to roll by.
For the next couple of days she was in the hospital, He came to check on her, but he never enters her room. He couldnât. He would ask the doctors, ask the nurses about her, even Grace, stand at the door, but he is not able to bring himself to go in.
His mother was back home, life went back to normal. His father was still in a coma. His mother comes by everyday too see him. She drops in to see Diana, then she goes to seat by Ambrossâs bed, reading the bible, then she would talk to him. That was how Emeka found her every time he came to see his father. He waits till she leaves before he goes in.
Then he seats there, watching him, willing his eyes to open.
Then he would talk to him as his mother does, doctors says it helps. He talks about random things, just talking. .
On his way out he always meets Grace, and she always asks him the same question
âWonât you at least see her today, donât you want to see her, wonât you?â
âI canât!! Not yet!!ââ he says âDonât tell her I check up on her or that you see me, pleaseâ then he would walk away.
But he makes sure she gets the best room, best treatment, sends her flowers telling her to get well soon⊠but he couldnât bring himself to meet her and talk to her.
âYou canât keep avoiding her you know?â Tayo told him one of the days
âI know!!â he replied, but it didnât stop him from not going, even if itâs to stand behind her closed door and hear her speak with Grace.
A couple of days later , Diana is being discharged from the hospital.
Grace enters the room âReady?â
âYes!!â she nods
âLetâs go!!â
They walk out, to the parking lot where they see her standing thereâŠwaiting.
She walks to them, âHello Grace?â
âHello Olive, I will be in the car â Grace tells Diana walking away, she and Olive exchange a cordial smile.
Olive turns to her âI am sorry I didnât get to come see youâ
âI didnât expect you tooâ Olive had no reason to come see her, it was okay if she didnât, she wouldnât hold it against her.
Olive nods âI just wanted to come by to say I am sorry for the way I treated you, for everything and to thank you for saving Emekaâs lifeâ
âEveryone comes to say the same thing to me, Mama, Tayo, you, not himâ
âYou want him to come himself? I know I even told hi-â
Diana is shaking her head âNo, I am not asking for him to come, itâs just that, I wouldnât have let him die if there was a way to avert his death, I saw it and I did it, not for him but for me, so everyone should stop telling me thank you, you would have done the same for him if you had the chance to save him, after all you love him and he loves you. Would you not have done the same thing to protect the man you love, you would have right?â
âYes I would have, and yet, I wasnât the one who was hurting, being humiliated, broken down. You would have walked away with the money and with the pain you were in, we would have understoodâ
We!
Diana smiles sadly âWell I didnât, because finally wealth would evaporate like smoke, but love is like burning fire that never quenchesâ
Olive smiles nodding âSound like something he would sayâ
âWho?â
Olive shakes her head âI am glad you are okay Diana, even though we started on the wrong foot, I am, glad you are okayââ
âThank you!!â
Olive is walking away
âYou will⊠take care of him will you? You will love and care for him?â
Olive turns âYes!!!â
Diana sniffs âI am happy he has a good woman by his side, I am happy he has someone who loves him wholeheartedly in ways I couldnât, and I am glad itâs you, because he wouldnât profess his feeling to someone unless he means it. Take care of Emeka will you, he is one of the good onesâ then she walks away into the car where Grace is waiting for her as they speed off.
âIf only you knew Diane that, that man has space for only one in his heart and sadly, it isnât who you thinkâ she walks away entering into her car and leaving.
A few weeks later, Emeka is backing his window when she walks into his office, she drops her bag and goes to him, slipping her hand between his hands and wraps her arms around him as she hugs him.
âSo many things to do, more of my shops opening here and there, just finished with the boutique here, all is set and other things awaitâ
He looks down at the arms, he rubs it, bringing it to his lips to kiss and then continuous staring out of the window..
âA penny for your thoughts!!â
âI wish! if I tell you what is making a chaotic mess in my heart you wouldnât be able to help meâ
âMaybe not, but sharing is half solving. I know you have been quiet and distant for this past few weeks, keeping to yourself, working more, doing nothing other than work work work. Mama says you hardly stay home, you busy yourself in the office and hardly eat, because I donât stay in your house anymore since that day, I canât keep tabs on you to make sure you are okay, should I whoop you, is that it? Why are you making your mother worry eh? Even Tayo is worried, and me too, every time I call you sound like you are elsewhere in mind and thoughtsâ Olive turns him âWhat is wrong? You know you can tell me, you can tell me anything. I gave you time and space because you asked for it, but⊠talk to me Emeka, you know you can right?â
âI know Olive, that is what worries me, you are too good a person too good a woman, you deserve better you doâ.
âI never complained, I knew what I was getting intoââ.
âBut still, you deserve betterââ
She sighs âoh Emeka, your eyes speaks a different language than what your mouth is saying, and though I see it and understand the secrets buried in your eyes, I wish that I can change it to suit meâ
âI am sorry Olive, itâs been a few weeks and yet, I canât stop thinking about it all, wanting to, fighting within myself, I canâ even face myself in the mirror, my father is still in coma, she⊠she someplace, somewhere, and I canât face her Olive, and I so want to, I do. And yet, I am torn, you are here, you love me, you stayed for me, you did everything for me even when I was on a mission to tear another down you stood by me, you love me Olive, you are beautiful woman, you have a good heart, and here you are, hoping for something more, my heart! But⊠I cannot give it out, to you. My heart is broken, shattered twice now Olive, because I have hurt the woman I have ever loved so deeply, and I fear she wouldnât ever forgive me. Nor accept meâ
âYou are still in love with her Emeka!!?â
He nods closing his eyes âEver since I met her again, there have been some part of me who wanted to throw all the pain away and love her as I have loved her before but I couldnât do it because I wanted to pay her back, but every time she cried I forced myself to be emotionless. The time we kissed, and almost made love I was almost loosing myself, when she got shot⊠I felt my heart almost ripping out from my chest when I thought she was going to die, it broke me. I realised then that⊠I was stupid, I was- I was in love with her, I never stopped loving her. Her scent, her essence, her body is imprinted on mine, her heart in mine, she is like the air I breath, she is an addiction that I cannot get rid of. Yes Olive, I am in love with her, I never stopped apparently and I want to go to her and tell her but fear. She may hate me now, she wouldnât want me close to her. She wouldnât want to see meâ
Olive closes and opens her eyes , she tears up but she smiles âOh Emeka you are a silly silly boy! I will love you, I will love you always, but the heart wants what it wants, your heart has her name written over it and even though it hurts badly, I canât force you to love me but I will be content I to know I loved you. God forbid I let you date me because you care for me or because you feel pity, which would be the wrongest thing to do. I too want a love like this and I pray I find it too. And stop thinking stupid things âshe cleans her eyes âstop standing there waiting then, go, go meet her, because there is no point guessing.â
âbut Olive there is you and-â
âPfft! Never love a person based on pity, never marry for one either. Love a person because you do and you love her Emeka, that bittersweet kind of love, so go love her, donât wait forever thinking she hates you, she loves you madly too.â she wipes her eyes again âGo, I have a flight to catch!â
âWait! You are leaving?â he turns staring at her as she walks away
âYes Emeka, I knew you loved her, I just wanted you to admit it and if you hadnât today I would have bundled you to her house myself.â She laughs âOne day, we are going to sit down, have a drink and talk about this silly thing called love, until then, go get your girl! And â She walks back to him â I love youâ she leans in and places a kiss to his lips letting it linger, then she steps away leaving him and walking away. He watches her leave, then he turns away facing the window again.
He needs to see her, he needs to tell her.
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