She Pulled Her Pants

Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 2

She come dey look me for face, na small small her

eyes wan go where my dicckk just pam for inside

where the dicckk dey frustrate dey stretch imself. I

just carry style do like say I wan fold my hands for

front make she talk wetin she wan talk make I go

continue my work. Na so I adjust my face like say I

be the most serious person for this world. My mind

walai, dey recite psalms and hymns make the preek

go down but for where?

“I want you to check my mailbox, there is an

attachment there. Print it for me.”

Na so I nod head waka comot from her office o. I no

wan hear say person poo come ask me make I smell

am. I know my pidgin English is really difficult to

comprehend but how will I put it for you guys to

understand my feelings better.

I went back to my table, opened yahoomail and

logged in Madam’s account. It was filled with more

than a million emails. Most of which were sent by

scammers. I wonder why them crazy scammers

would want to scam someone who is a lady and still

use,

“I am Miss Trisha P. I lost my father in the war in

senegal and he left 200 Billion Dollars for me”

Seriously, it is foolish to scam someone with such a

huge amount of money. I can’t fall for such

scamming. Instead I will fall for far lesser amount.

“Kpulup”

If you use facebook well, you will understand this

sound. I always have my earpiece on my ears

whenever I’m in front of the system. This is to alert

me whenever there is a message. I jumped madam’s

task and browsed facebook.

“New Message from Perpetual”

Was boldly displayed on the tab above. Hmmmm…

Great. I quickly clicked in order to see the message.

“Hi”

The message read.

I was confused o. Is it that this babe has fallen for

me? Hmm… I am not priding myself as handsome o,

but I have one weapon. Being fair. You know, your

colour can break barriers. Yeah, put 6 people and let

one be fair among them. You will notice the fair

person first. Such was it o. I chose only dark guys as

friends so babes will always see me. Kapish?

“Hallo”

I did not wait for her to reply, I quickly composed

this and sent…

“I dreamed that power was given to me. I was meant

to do something with it but with all the power

something still lacked.”

I stopped there.

“Are you a poet?”

She asked me.

Bingo!!! Yellow fineboy and also a poet, you see

combination? I only hid the being a Writer aspect

from her.

“I won’t say yes but looking at your pictures inspire

me. I could become the president of Nigeria by just

meditating on your pictures”

I replied.

“Haaaaaaa… You are flattering me oo”

She screamed-typed.

“Me? No o. I am saying the truth as was just revealed

to me by an angel just now. He said you left them in

heaven and he has been sent to monitor you. Guess

what?”

I typed.

“….Wat (with a squeezed faced emoticon)

“He said I am the right person for you”

I typed back.

Next thing I saw on the screen was…

“OK.. Bye!!!”

Yeah… Una know the reaction. I was shocked and for

once, regretted being a poet. If only I had known.

I just dey look blankly at my screen. What

happened? What did I say wrong? Well, I shrugged

and went back to checking Madam’s mailbox. I

printed what she wanted and took it to her. She

smiled, collected it and told me to be careful with

women. Since she was the superior and na Madam-

Staff relationship, I just muttered OK and walked

back to my table.